who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
