I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Randomize
