It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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