My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
