I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
