Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
It was confusing and full of hummus
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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