I cockslap morals
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize