two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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