did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
