Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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