so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize