I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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