Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
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