We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
