Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
