haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
