On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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