He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
