Will you blow on my dice?
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize