i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
