Sponge bath it is.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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