Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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