Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I just blew my weed a kiss
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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