i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize