I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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