a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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