I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
