OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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