ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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