I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
