if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
