so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
