Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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