Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
