I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
this just has baby written all over it
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
