____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
my poor anus
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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