Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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