Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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