OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
