Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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