would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
