it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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