im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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