So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
