I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
