I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
