As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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