I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
it's like iHOP with fire
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
