she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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