Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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