brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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