Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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